Welcome! So good to see you! Come on in! I've been hard at work getting ready for the party!
Here, let me get you a drink. The snacks are just about to come out of the oven, so why don't you have a seat and get comfortable while I finish up in the kitchen? Please, talk amongst yourselves. Anyone up for a game? Or some naked bacon grease wrestling?
Okay. Here are the snacks. After serious consideration, I would like to say that I may not be able to stop eating them.
See? Here, have one.
4/21/07
bacon party!!!
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37 comments:
that cocktail is horrifying.
where is everyone?
here is my bacon apparel. i would like you to know that leonard nimoy absconded with the right slice immediately following this photograph.
that is not a flattering photo.
and that bacon was tres slimy.
the things i do for you, tits mcgee.
::picking self up off of floor::
Jesus, Kendra. Between the picture of the lotion by the side of your bed and that picture, I will have fantasy fodder for weeks. Nay, months.
I love you without bounds.
Also, I am wildly jealous of Leonard Nimoy.
you know, i figured you would be the one to notice the lotion.
it's coconut scented, fyi.
oh, i have to go to target, but i'll be back.
omg. bacon and boobs! i am so sorry i didn't rsvp.
i was gone so long and yet this party has not progressed.
i suggest n00d bacon grease wrestling to pick things up a bit.
I tried to join the bacon party but I ended up at a vegan breakfast place. darn.
Kendra - Thank you for the detail on the fragrance. That will help.
Madge - You are always welcome, with or without an RSVP. Consider this your open invitation.
Kendra - Excellent. I'll go put on my pancetta pasties.
Knitty - Well, get your ass over here, girl! You're just in time for the wrestling!
BTW - I LOVE that watch.
With my mother-in-law, and two borrowed Sysmidgets in the house, there will be no photography.
Saved by decorum.
(And the bacon thong was not in the least bit attractive. On me, anyway.)
But I will share an actual recipe.
Fudge-bacon-fudge
(prepared for Reverend Jack's Hillbilly Tapas party)
One layer of "Quick Nut Fudge"
1 lb. confectioners' sugar
1/2 cup cocoa
1/4 tsp salt
6 tbsp. sweet delicious butter
4 tablespoons milk
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 cup chopped pecans or walnuts
Combine all ingredients (but hold those nuts for now) in the top of a double boiler. Place over simmering water and stir until smooth. Add nuts and mix. Spread quickly in a buttered 9" x 9" pan.
Cook 3/4 lb. of bacon. While nude.
When the bacon cools, arrange in a tight lattice pattern on top of the chocolate fudge. There's nothing like a tight lattice pattern.
Make another batch of fudge. Feel free to remain in your current unclothed state. Skip the cocoa, and give it an extra splash of the vanilla extract. Prepare as above.
Drizzle the vanilla fudge over the bacon. Take your time.
Oh, you got some on yourself. Sorry.
Let the fudge bacon fudge cool. Cut into bite-sized morsels.
The vanilla fudge has the added benefit of looking like bacon grease.
Hello!!! I don't think anyone can top Kendra's bacon tits, so I won't even try. And since I am currently dieting, I am simply going to have to enjoy the virtual smell of bacon cooking - really is there a better smell in the world?
However, I can't come to a party empty-handed. So here is a bacon laugh from the past. It's bacon!!!
now this is getting interesting.
pasties!
bacon!
my goodness i will never look at bacon the same
Sysm - You should know that recipe made me completely aroused.
Brooke - Thank you! That was a delightful contribution. I would like to suggest, however, that you really ought to join in with the wrestling. Seriously. You'll like it.
Kendra - I have a little kink in my neck now from that last hold you had me in.
Knitty - I know, right? Hooray!
I love everything about bacon! I love nuking it, I love draping it upon myself ... alas, the camera wasn't quick enough to capture me eating it!
The best recipe of all time is quick & easy:
Coat bacon with brown sugar and wrap around thin (grissini-style) breadsticks. Lay onto a pan with bread sticks up on edge of pan so they don't soak in teh grease. Cook at 375 until sizzling.
Delicious appetizer! Trust me!
Now ... where is the alcohol-free beer?
Oh my, Kendra's turkey-bacon tattooed loveliness and yoru pancetta pasties put my modest little picture to shame. SHAME!
Sorry I got here so late, I was painting.
Spinnerina!!! Woo!!! I thought I was starting to get a little sick of eating bacon, but that second picture totally just gave me my appetite back. No shame, baby. You're hot stuff. That recipe is sick. In the good way. As for the near beer, fuck that shit. I've got a pitcher of virgin daiquiris in the kitchen for you, sweetie.
the men are seriously slacking.
also, i apologize for getting bacon grease on your linens.
2001 Arbios Alexander Valley Cabernet Sauvignon
"Sporting a bold 14.2% alcohol level, the Arbios Cabernet is a huge wine with deep & concentrated nose of green pepper and cassis. The palate is bold and powerful with tannin to shed."
Ahhhhhh.
Goes great with bacon.
Kendra - Hubby just said to me, "you tell them they're a bunch of pussy boys" because the only bloggers tough enough to show their stuff so far are girls. And no worries about the linens, baby. It was worth it.
Sysm - You are one classy motherfucker.
Wow. I had no idea a bacon party could be so terrifying. That drink is some freaky shit.
I know I'm a little late but I got some munchies for the wasted folk.
I brought a bunch of bacon wrapped shit:
scallops, asparagus, bocconcini, cherry tomatoes and pineapple.
I also made bacon dipper devils.
1 carton eggs hard boiled
remove shell, cut in half length ways.
remove yolks and mash with
3 tbsp mayo
3 tbsp full fat sour cream
6 strips of crispy bacon crushed in bits
2 tbsp finely diced green onion
pinch of salt+pepper+mustard powder
few dashes of tobasco.
*fill a piping bag with the mixture and re-fill the whites. Garnish with a morsel of roquefort and a small bit of maraschino cherry.
When do the tittie shooters start?
Hey miss kendra makes a good point about the lack of men...
guess it really is a bacon party (strips only puleeze)
btw. Spinners photo of the bacon in her cleavage is strangely erotic.
I've wanted to eat raw pancetta before, but never so much!
You know, I always figured you had a nice rack, given your name and all, but Zeuses balls, you have a truly Olympian pair.
Hey, Tits! Sorry I'm late! As you can see, I been busy fryin' up some bacon fer yer friend from the other day.
But now that I'm here, I gotta say that I am ready for a bacon, lettuce, and tittie sandwich, 'cause Tits, Miss Kendra, and Spinning Girl's artful photographs are workin' their magic on yer ol' buddy Sticky, don't you understand.
::yawns, stretches::
Kat - Your snacks so rocked, but, oh, my head. One titty shooter too many.
Bug - Aw, shucks. ::blushes::
Sticky - That slut'll eat anyone's bacon. As for your BLTitty sandwich, you'll have to take a rain check, baby. I'm wiped. Now where's the fucking coffee?
Do you mind if I start worshiping your rack as my God?
Between you, Kendra, and Spinning Girl, I've never wanted bacon so bad in my life! And I'm a fat guy who likes the bacon...
i decided to prep the bacon-feast while playing an old game i got many years ago for xmas called (no joke) Pig Mania.
You put these wee little plastic piggies in a dice cup and roll 'em. depending on how they land, you score points. major points if they are touching (that's called Making Bacon) and even bigger points if they land on their noses - that's a Leaning Hog Jowler and scores big too.
who says there are no good Pig Dice Games?
That said, them pics of your efforts make my local participation seem a bit ... sad and lonely.
i should take pics of the dog here who is watching all this with much intensity. i'm jes' hopin' it's the bacon which has her attention.
I'm too late for the party, unfortunately, so let me just add:
hooray for bacon! hooray for boobies! hooray for bacon and boobies!!!
Todd - Though her cushiony goodness promises salvation, you should be forewarned that my rack is an angry and vengeful god. I'll bet you regret missing the party now, hm?
Joe - I so want to play Pig Mania with you.
Jiggs - I'm extremely disappointed in you. I had hoped for full-frontal bacon.
Did I miss all the fun?! Looks like there was a big ass slut party in here! Titillating photos all around.
full frontal bacon would have made this party complete.
this is a party that i can totally get into. i don't have any bacon in the house, but i can put hot cereal down my pants.
Bostick - You completely missed the fun, and I am extremely disappointed that you couldn't be bothered to take a single picture for me, given your love of posing in front of the camera like a girl.
Kendra - I couldn't agree more.
Jamwall - Please, god, please take a picture of that. Spinnerina will lose her mind.
Dont hate me because I am beautiful. I did not understand the rules and was overwhelmed by all the titty flesh.
Besides, bacon causes strokes. The brain kind not the hand kind.
What bacon? There was bacon in that picture? hehehe
Count me in on the naked bacon grease wrestling!!
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